Thursday, March 20, 2008

The Boycott

(The following is an excerpt from "21st Century Global History." "21st Century Global History" was published on October 4th, 2058, and is suitable for Grades 5-8.)

While their exponential growth in popularity was a factor, it was their actions on March 19, 2008 that started the nation on the path to the prosperity we currently enjoy. "The Boycott" was a short-lived dispute over compensation for the Red Sox' coaching staff, which was quickly resolved in favor of the coaches. After this watershed event, the Red Sox began to realize the extent of the power they wielded.

Shortly after "The Boycott", the Red Sox journeyed to Tokyo to meet with the illustrious Japanese ambassador, Doraemon. Over a plate of dorayaki, Jason Varitek and Doraemon crafted "The 'Tek Precepts", the set of principles which have guided all diplomatic interactions for the last fifty years. The momentous meeting between the two was chronicled by author Curtis Schilling in his essay, "The Day Everything Changed." Schilling retired from baseball in May 2008, in order to concentrate on his literary and political careers.

President-Elect John McCain, aware of the Red Sox' increasing influence on the political landscape, chose Schilling as his running mate in the 2008 Presidential Election. The McCain-Schilling ticket, backed by the financial might of Red Sox supporters (See also, "Red Sox Nation."), won the election handily. Schilling was dispatched to The Middle East, where he negotiated a successful resolution to the "Oil War." (See also, "Iraqi Conflict", "War in Iraq.")

McCain and Schilling were elected to serve a second term in 2012, defeating the Democrats' Clinton/Romney ticket by a record margin. McCain and Schilling focused on domestic policy, until March of 2013, when they conceded all political power to Jason Varitek. After McCain's "Concession of Authority", the First Catcher oversaw the series of social and economic reforms that returned the country to its' current prominence.

While First Catcher Varitek guided the country to prosperity, a number of his former Red Sox teammates also played integral roles. Craig Breslow was instrumental in the eradication of global warming. Julian Tavarez and Manny Ramirez made considerable contributions to social policy. Dustin Pedroia...

("21st Century Global History" can be digitally acquired from Amazon.com, or directly from the publisher, Beckett Press.)

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