Moose on the loose...

(originally posted 8/8/07)

The Red Sox overcame a great deal of adversity this past weekend, in winning two of three games in Seattle. First off, the Mariners are kind of a good team, and have had a lot of home success (nine wins in a row) against Boston in recent years. Secondly, the Red Sox still have Wily Mo Pena on their team. Not good, that. Thirdly, the new Friendly's Scoop was overdue- the Sox are a .500 team in games played with an overdue Scoop. Additionally, NESN had to make the trip west without All-Stars Tom Caron, Dennis Eckersley, and Amalie Benjamin. While Eric Frede and Gordon Edes are more than capable, you just can't replace the kind of numbers Caron, Eckersley, and Benjamin put up. Frede and Edes did enough to help get the Sox out of there with two wins. Well done!

There were some moose-related concerns that need to be addressed. Prior to the bottom of the fifth inning in Sunday's 9-2 Sox victory, the Mariner Moose almost knocked Sox CF Coco Crisp out of the game, with an unprovoked ATV attack. Fortunately, the nimble outfielder was able to dodge out of the way before a career-ending injury was sustained. Strangely, outside of a scathing verbal attack from Red Sox Pitching Coach John Farrell, there wasn't much of a response from Boston. Considering that Josh Beckett and Jonathan Papelbon are both experienced in "handling" such matters, it is surprising that Fenway doesn't have a new addition. Perhaps hanging in front of the entrance to the visitor's clubhouse. (THAT would be rather intimidating.) Hopefully, Wally the Green Monster will have a proportional response at the ready for the Mariners' next visit to Boston.

In other moosian news, NESN aired clips of a Papelbonian Moose Hunting expedition that took place during the offseason. It was certainly a positive that, instead of car racing people, we were treated to Papelbonian content. You just can't lose with any sort of Papelbonian content. (Well, you usually can't lose.)

I'll be the first one to admit I was excited by the prospect of seeing some clips of Papelbon hunting. What's cooler that slaughtering wild animals? I mean, besides slaughtering them with crossbows and whatnot? The poetry and the romance of the kill! It doesn't get much better than that. Well, next time, I think I'd rather watch the car racing people. First off, Papelbon was operating the camera. From his inability to hold the camera steady, it was obvious that he had been holding it for an extended period of time. Apparently, there are no "pitch counts" in hunting. Then, the Jewel of the Boston Red Sox organization crossed over a seemingly bottomless chasm on a rickety, old rope bridge. Yikes! Couldn't we assign someone more, um, expendable, to go across that bridge? (See Pena, Wily Mo.)

Next, there was a chasm in the road, making it unpassable. Unpassable, for those with fewer than 35 saves in 2006, perhaps. Papelbon and Co. just got some big logs, stuck them in the road chasm, and drove right on over it. (Though, not without some difficulty.) That was too much for this viewer, as I couldn't watch any more. If the Red Sox can't put some language in Hunter Boy's contract preventing him from such dangerous undertakings (and this danger was all BEFORE he started trying to kill half-ton wild animals!), they shouldn't televise them. We'd be better off watching the Sox Appeal episode with all the car racing people. MUCH less disconcerting.